Tag Archives: surfergirl

Holding Space For Myself Is My New Sport

I’ve always been a sensitive person. I remember being a little girl and having really big feelings. I can remember grown ups saying they weren’t upset but could feel their “upset” energy. Even though their words said one thing, it didn’t match their actions or energy. And if someone was upset, I remember feeling “their upset” in the pit of my stomach. I didn’t know why I felt it when someone else was upset back then. However, I have a name for it now and it’s called being an empath.

Empath: a person with the paranormal ability to apprehend the mental or emotional state of another individual.

I still have big feelings AND I’m still really sensitive. I think being an empath has served me well as a mama. I’m able to connect, validate and empathize with my kids in a special way.C0DAC492-0958-4373-A253-1220FA013E7BPre Surf pose where I’m nervous and excited all at once. This 9’6 Dick Brewer surf board and I got along really well. 🙂

This year, I’m learning to protect myself with limits and a boundary bubble. I’ve been setting and practicing boundaries with my kids for a couple of years. We practice respect, grace, courtesy and kind communication at home. Boundaries with adults is much harder I must admit. pShRXZjcRHKxjkicdEjB7QPost Surf Sparkle. Learning to surf, post 3 kids and in my 40’s has been humbling and beautiful all at once.

Being able to hold space for my kids is something I’m very good at. It’s natural and so automatic for me. From the second I found out I was pregnant with all of my peanuts, I’ve been able to prioritize their health and well being. And once they were born, it was on. From a sleep schedule to daily and life decisions that were in the kids’ best interest were and still are an easy choice for me.

However, I found myself agreeing to things I didn’t want to do to accommodate the other adult person’s feelings. Setting boundaries in my adult relationships is hard because I love connection and camaraderie. And I have a very fun public life and job that allows for lots of fun conversation. Sometimes, I will say to the same co-worker 10 times I don’t discuss my personal life at work. I know that people can’t help themselves and are so curious because I do have a wonderful life. But protecting my energy is one way I hold space for myself. And It’s not my job to entertain other adults when I don’t want to. I want to talk about the good stuff, like surfing and how happy and healthy my kids are. And whether or not we’ll open a present on Christmas eve? You know, important holiday traditions.

As I continue (daily) to hold space for myself with adult conversations and adult plans I agree to. I’m breathing into it. Sometimes, it still feels hard to disappoint other adults by not doing exactly what they want. But I know that modeling healthy behavior while speaking clear, open communication is the best teacher for my little people.

And when I see AND hear my kids empathize with one another and other people I know I’m doing good work. The real work. Teaching my littles from a place of integrity and love. For the first time since they were babies my kids have joined me at the the chiropractor. They always came with me as babies (annual exam, dentist, eye appointment) you name it, they came with me to my mandatory appointments. Don’t be jealous-haha! These days I can usual schedule my dentist and annuals while they’re at school. #winning

But I take them to the chiropractor and the gym here and there on purpose. So, they can see me taking care of me.

Mama needs to take care of mama so she can take care of us.                                                                        ~Quote from Blaize, Pepper and Kai on the reg 

 

 

Surfer Girls In Maui

IMG_9080Longboard surfing with my mom!

It’s amazing how much fun you can have in 24hours when you focus on “the fun.” I think short term travel vs. long term travel are two different animals. I’ve done both and like both. However, as a mom I don’t want to be away from my bebes for too long. So, I squeeze in the fun whenever I can. So much fun to be had on a layover!

Aloha Friday

Seeking more adventures, life balance and lots of laughs next year! Only 16 days left in 2017 and I couldn’t be more excited. 2017 rocked my world in so many ways. I’m ready to say farewell, goodbye and hello to the new year. IMG_4528Doing a 360 degree spin jump this summer

As I reflect on the past year, I shake my head. It’s like the saying goes, 2 steps forward and one step back. Or 2 steps forward and 4 steps back in my world. One big change for me is that I’m focusing on what I want, instead of what I don’t want. I used to reiterate what I don’t want because I thought that list was easier to swallow. When the noise rises, so does my self care. A friend was surprised that I did anything other than yoga. Wait, what, you go to the gym too?! Haha! Yeah, you could say that. Running, spinning and gym time is way easier for me than the yoga. However, the yoga is my best effort toward self love and self care. It’s what I need but not usually what I want. #justsayin

I’m ramping up the self care and gettin’ after the good stuff. Focusing on the fun, the travel and the mom life (the best life) this next trip around the sun.

So, I dragged my tired, puffy self to burncycle this morning. I haven’t been for over 10months and it left a mark. I will be walking funny for days… But, I’m looking for a new outcome 2018 so gotta put my money where my mouth is. There is no butt kicking quite like a cycle class. And, I LOVED it!IMG_2206Here’s to an awesome last couple of weeks of 2017 and a bigger and better 2018!

Let the good times roll, my friends.